Whack

    I've returned yet again,but regrettably, I am the bearer of bad news! Unfortunately ladies you have either encountered or are currently dating a guy that undoubtedly falls into a category in which we Alpha Males call "WHACK''! Yes I know this may be a shocker to most but hopefully an enlightening experience for others! Who knows, a few guys may even straighten their lives out after reading this…or not! Anyway, lets proceed on this journey of whackness.
    Definition:
              Whack: 1) appalling in nature. 2)verb: to assassinate
    Drop the "h": According to Urban Dictionary...
               Wack: 1) Lame, sorry ass, "ain't even legit" 2) Jerk off
    Definition #1 used as a verb is still appropriate because embracing whackness is a the killer of "cool"! One shot one kill, my friends! Since both definitions are fittting, I'm gonna combine the two and keep the "h"!  The moment of truth is upon us! Let's go! Fellas, you're whack if:

1. If you've ever offered cunnilingus or monetary compensation in the hopes of "hooking up" with a woman. Make a meal of it or pay for it, homie?! Hey, what ever works right?!#Fail
2. Ladies, if your finger(s) and/or sex toys have made its way into your male counterparts anus upon his request or yours…maybe "whack" isn't the word for that particular gentleman. Just sayin!
3. If you have children by multiple women and only claim the kid(s) of the girl you still kind of like…
4. If a guy brags about sexual experience on social sites,i.e.,facebook, twitter,etc!
5. If you play in your hair more than she does.
6. If you wear or have worn colored contacts.
7. If your persona seems to be borrowed from your favorite rapper or anyone that isn't you.
8. If you have never left your city or state! Really?! Get up, get out and get somethin'!
9. If you have ever left your house to go out and said to yourself,"I'm fighting somebody tonight!".
10. If you ever used the line,"It ain't tricking if you got it!", at the bar but the next day had to borrow some cash from a homie.
11. If your light bill money has ever been on the floor of a strip club.
12. If you have ever cursed a girl out for not wanting your number or giving you hers.
13. If you debuted your new leather jacket just because it got down to 70 degrees.
14. If the AC doesn't work in your car but speakers are knocking pictures off the walls in neighborhoods.
15. If on pay day you withdraw your entire check so your wallet looks like a bible. 
16. If you're trying to talk to a woman and quote rap lyrics!
17. If you play fight with your friends and use more profanity cause you're out of your element in the presence of women. We're on the Sandlot now?!
18. If you take pictures in the mirror while biting your lip.
19. If your conversation doesn't exceed clothes, money, or getting in dat ass!
20. If you've ever been at a restaurant and said,"Man,this is for white people!" Open ya mind, Chicken George!! The days of the MoTeaSir tribe are far gone!

      If you are guilty of these offenses don't fret. You are apart of what knowledgeable men and women know as The Balance. Without the balance the world would swallow itself. Possessing knowledge of the balance means that you understand that everyone cant be cool, attractive, funny, ambitious,etc. Maybe your dating life needs more variety or maybe this blog was an eye opener that there is no variety in it at all!
      I'm not worried about being sought out by some offended whack guy because whack guys are delusional and are completely unaware of their current state!
…and I'm out! Taxi!!