What If We All had Super Powers?

   

      Who wouldn't want to be able to leap over tall buildings or fly like a bird, huhn? Growing up,
 most comic book fans, like myself, have had countless conversations of what super powers they would posses if the opportunity presented itself,but what would it be like if everyone had super powers?

• Rapid self- healers would probably be the accident proned or the reckless.  So I guess that would be a lot of kids and middle aged men. 
• Little Korean women would have retractable claws/finger nails. a pretty scary thought. 
• Most teleporters and flyer's would most likely be obese. Think about it, if you didn't have to walk ANYwhere! Just one thought could put you in another room or levitate you across entire cities,states, or continents. Your fat ass wouldn't get any kind of cardio! *Most "Blacks" are afraid of heights so that whole flying thing is out the window(pun intended)for the majority of the sistas and brothas*. The Obesity thing also goes for those who have the use of telekinesis(the ability to move objects with your mind).  
• Telepaths(mind readers) would be Big business owners, lawyers, insurance company execs,etc. Why not capitalise, right?
• Super strength would go to law enforcement, fire fighter, military types.
• Everyone who has super speed would be as skinny as an African marathon runner!
• Shape shifters would be a bunch of people that straddle the fence on sexuality or have low self esteem! Straight guys are gonna be shagging men posing as women. Wait…that already happens. 
• Invisibility would be right at home for the clinically depressed.
• Being able to burst into flames like the Human Torch would be a hit a Southern Decadence.
• The ability to duplicate yourself would go great for work-a-holics, lazy housewives, and closet cheaters!
• Receptionist  and women on the rag would have the highest murder count if they possessed the ability to fire laser beams from their eyes!
• With powers like Ice Man, at keg parties and tail gating, you'd be in high demand!
• X-ray vision would go straight to the pervs! Damn lurkers!

     Truth be told, humans are far too emotional to posses super powers. People would be dying everyday! Think about what would happen in traffic jams; the interstates and highways would be battle grounds. Hell, state and government workers would have the shortest life spans. Those rude bastards would be vaporized on sight, unless it was there lunch break.
      Things would definitely be more interesting,but most likely there would be complete pandemonium. I think it's safe to say that super powers should be left in the books and the imagination!